View from the deck on a glorious morning in early June.

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Thoughts on break-up, March 2007

I am starting to feel cabin feverish. We have lived surrounded by snow since the end of November. The place has looked like the picture below a lot. The end is obviously near. It is getting warmer and the ditches are running with melt water. We can't DO anything outside yet. The land is covered with a foot or 2 of slush.

It is tempting to just want to skip this time and hurry forward to spring. But then I catch myself. The older you are and the more the future shortens, the more you need to cherish each moment just as it presents itself.

Living in the "if only" is a luxury for those whose future still feels unlimited. I don't mean to be morbid, but the reality is that I am 63, my husband is 70, and every year that we continue in good health is a Gift. OK, we work at it, but still.

You start to realize that this moment, here and now, may well be one of those good old days that you look back on in the future. Why not appreciate it NOW!

Of course this applies to us all. But the  young are granted the illusion of immortality. The rational mind knows better, but the body/soul has not really caught on yet.

As I am typing this I see a rare glimpse of sunlight over the melting snow.
So I sit here behind the desk and appreciate this brief ray of sunlight, even though my soul is yearning for blue skies and green plants.
Appreciate this ramshackle trailer home , because it is shelter.
Appreciate my pain-free sturdy body, extra pounds of cellulite and all.

And so on.....

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